Ki Moments Blog

Support for life’s “key” moments.

Showing posts in the category “Centered Presence”

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  • July 1, 2023

    Wobbling

    Wobbling

    When life was easier, I would sometimes look around and wonder how I would manage the things life might throw my way--if and when--life being what it is. "I teach this stuff," I would say. Will I practice it in times that are not so easy? Recently, I found out...

  • June 1, 2023

    Tension Contagion: Watching and Noticing

    Tension Contagion: Watching and Noticing

    When I watch aikido students in action, I always learn. At a recent seminar at Portsmouth Aikido, the dojo I founded in 1995, I had another opportunity to reinforce an awareness I've written about before.

    I'm not often on the mat these days, and it's always an experience in discovery to sit on the sidelines.

    For example, as I watched two beginners struggling to get the technique just right, their focus and commitment was intense, and I began to notice my own body tightening. I sensed the tension in the students' bodies as they practiced the technique, and I could feel it in my own as I observed...

  • April 1, 2023

    Curiosity Revisited

    Curiosity Revisited

    Indeed.

    I visit curiosity often in these posts. Curiosity--a key communication skill that helps us manage our ki (energy) in times of stress, struggle, and conflict.

    One of my favorite curiosity stories was written back in August, 2013: "I'd Actually Have to Be Curious!" I was reminded of the story recently when my husband said: "I'm just curious," and asked me a question like, "What makes you want to do it that way?

  • March 1, 2023

    Breathing Our Way Back to Balance

    Breathing Our Way Back to Balance

    Recently, I was playing with my niece and nephews, 4-year-old triplets full--really full--of rambunctious energy. It was total fun, and they wore me out. At one point, as I saw them headed my way for more playtime, I suggested we all take a breath.

    I demonstrated what I meant by breathing in through my nose and out through my mouth. After a few conscious breaths, I invited them to "play" along.

    There was an immediate change...

  • November 1, 2022

    Thoughts for Thanksgiving: Choose the Good Ones

    Thoughts for Thanksgiving: Choose the Good Ones

    Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

     — Robert Brault

    You may have noticed I like to write about gratitude. I think it's because gratitude is one way I center myself, remember what's important in my life, and return to the present moment. 

    This time of year, in particular, as we head into Thanksgiving and the December holidays, I ask myself and my readers to think about the ways we are already blessed, things we may be blind to because they’re always there, and to name them....

  • October 1, 2022

    Everyday Aikido: Managing Yourself

    Everyday Aikido: Managing Yourself

    It's a very ancient saying, but a true and honest thought, that if you become a teacher, by your pupils you'll be taught.

    -- Getting to Know You, The King and I

    I love the truth of this song from The King and I. I always learn more from my students and from the people I coach than I impart. Yes, I'm the instructor. I share concepts, tools, skills, and experiences from Aikido. It's the student, however, who is the expert in their life. Only they have the wisdom and ability to implement what they're learning. They understand the difficulty of their conflict in ways I cannot, and how what they're experiencing on the mat might apply in their everyday life (or not).

    Recently I was privileged to work with college students whose professor assigned them the task of journaling about their experience on the mat after the class was over (we were fortunate to have real mats and practice physical Aikido). 

    As I read through their journal entries, I knew what my next post would be. I hope you learn as much from the writing of these young  people as I did. Names have been changed. Sentiments are real....

  • September 1, 2022

    Every Day Gratitude: It's in the Noticing

    Every Day Gratitude: It's in the Noticing

    “Let the beauty we love be what we do. There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground.” 
    ― Rumi

    Recently I was in a group under a tent on a beautiful day. The purpose of the gathering was to celebrate a beloved soul taken too early from a happy, meaning-filled life. The speakers were kind and considerate, and often tearful. I sat in the very large group, one of many who loved this person, and I looked about me at the loving faces, feeling the warm sun, a light breeze, and the depth of our common connection. And I noticed the ki moment....

  • July 1, 2022

    Free Will or Free Won't? The Mystery of Centered Presence

    Free Will or Free Won't? The Mystery of Centered Presence

    As I ponder the upcoming month, July 4--Independence Day--comes to mind. While I've written hundreds of posts over the years, my July posts suggest a similar theme--the freedoms we take for granted and how to remember these gifts every day. 

    Today I'm thinking about how we sometimes exercise our freedoms in ways that limit or harm, and what to do about that. In the spirit of free will and the constitutional freedoms we enjoy in the U.S., am I too impulsive? Am I jeopardizing the very freedoms I cherish and that hold our communities together?

    • I have the freedom to be unkind, for example, but should I be? What purpose will it serve?
    • I'm free to speak whatever is on my mind, but who will benefit from my adrenalized rush (besides me)?
    • I can post what I want on the Web, but what effect will it have on the person, the community, humanity, on my future self?

    Are these fair questions?....

  • March 1, 2022

    Love's in need of love today

    Love's in need of love today

    The gospel according to Stevie Wonder goes like this: 

    Love’s in need of love today

    Don’t delay, send yours in right away

    Hate’s goin' 'round breakin' many hearts

    Stop it, please, before it’s gone too far

    Love’s in need of love today

    And from Thích Nhất Hạnh 

    When you understand and you show you understand, you can love, and the situation changes.

    I recently returned from The Magic of Skiing program, held yearly by my friend and mentor, author and teacher Thomas Crum. It was indeed a magical program--a week of meditation, physical activity, deep conversation and community in the magical town of Aspen, Colorado. And, of course, skiing!! What I walked away with was a renewed sense of wonder at the love that exists in each of us.....

  • February 1, 2022

    this mystery called existence

    this mystery called existence

    Last month I wrote about my intention to be more patient. I would ask for "just a little more" patience with life, with obstacles, with other people, and in general.

    Today I'm being patient with myself. My energy is low, I don't feel like myself, and it's hard not to wish for a different state of being. So I'm just noticing, wondering and writing. As Rumi says in my favorite Rumi poem...

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