Recently I read a post by Rev. Chris Mereschuk, an unsettled pastor, consultant and coach from Northampton, MA. 

Rev. Chris writes in part:

I’ve been extra snappy lately. I’m more on edge, more easily frustrated. My tolerance for missteps and mistakes—mine and others’—is way low. There’s this persistent undercurrent of irritability. I’m primed to lash out and bite at someone. Every comment feels like criticism, and I quickly move from defensive to offensive!

I don’t think I’m the only one feeling this way. I often witness this online, and too often in exchanges between church people. Sometimes, even when folks are in agreement, they start snapping at each other....

I’m not longing for some kind of performative civility. I’m longing for grace. Some empathy, compassion, restraint. No, don’t stay silent. Yes, respond, call out, call in. But I need to pause a hot second and check if I’m fixing my mouth to speak or to take a bite out of someone. Chewing someone out might fill me up for a minute, but it ultimately makes me sick to my stomach and leaves the other person deeply wounded....

(You can read the entire post on the UCC Website.)

Take a Breath

I was struck by the post, because I could have written it. Because I can get grouchy, too. 

In these unsettled times, it's easy to make snap judgements that make me snap at people or snap about people to other people. And all it takes is one breath, one centered moment to think again and hold my thought or speak it in ways that futher relationship and connection. Maybe start a different kind of conversation.

Thomas Merton, American Trappist monk, writer, theologian, mystic, and poet, is quoted as saying: We must make the choices that enable us to fulfill the deepest capacities of our real selves.

It only takes a breath to find our real self, our best self, the one that allows connection to blossom.