Support for life’s “key” moments.
I'm on a spiritual journey. The church happens to be the boat I'm traveling on.
~William Kent Krueger
I'm recently returned from a silent retreat at the Holy Cross Monastery in West Park, NY, the retreat title: "In Silence with Thomas Merton", with Brother Ephrem Arcement, OHC. It was wonderful, On many levels....
How often do I revisit what I teach? Almost every day.
When the difficult, courageous, crucial, purposeful or just plain hard-to-hold conversation is imminent, I get out my "Checklist", tips, and resources. I call supportive friends and get to work on myself--looking inward to see what makes "this" one different, challenging, and off-putting.
I know I'm not the only one who's tentative about these conversations. In fact, most recently I've noticed a plethora of articles on the subject, which all pretty much say the same thing.
I'm revisiting the topic today with a few of the most common coaching suggestions....
Like waves crashing against the shore, worry, regret, and fear-based narratives wash through my brain. Over and over again. In the middle of the night, day, whenever, whenever. They find me.
Spinning thoughts -- "if onlys", missed "do overs", and anxiety
My husband called me to the kitchen window a few days ago and asked me what I thought was attached to (and hanging from) the squirrel's nest in the bushes that line our driveway. It looked like a dead rabbit, but it couldn't be, right? Too heavy! We stared at the thing for several minutes trying to understand what we were seeing. Then it moved--Woh! Could it be a live rabbit? A squirrel? Something else?
The bush is only ten yards from the window but we couldn't figure it out.
It's New Year's Day and I'm thinking about and visualizing the year ahead. My friend and mentor, author Thomas Crum, introduced an experience at one of his Magic trainings many years back. We were asked to imagine ourselves a year ahead and to write down all the things we were grateful for that had happened in the year just gone by.
So... if I were to do that exercise today (and I did), I would be visualizing myself on January 1, 2025, and writing down all the events, experiences, people, and actions that happened in 2025 that I was grateful for....
Last December I wrote a post titled "Death as an Ally" about the preciousness of each fleeting moment. In the past year, I've come to appreciate this sentiment even more.
As you move into the month of December with its accompanying demands on your time--the cards, parties, family visits, joys and conflicts--maybe take a moment each day (oftener if you're willing) to stop and notice this moment, this...ki... moment, a moment that will not come again. Find ways to reinforce presence....
My last two posts in September and October gave some context on the next steps I'm taking into the unknown. It's weird. I don't know how not to be busy, how not to be engaged in an endeavor that gives back so much. I'm not sure what that's going to be like.
You may ask, "Then why stop?" And I'm not totally sure of the answer. I love what I do - I still have some work as I write this - and I also have a sense that this is a good time to bring this part of my worklife to a close. It's an interesting, thought-provoking, exciting place to be.
I sometimes listen to the Calm app when I'm meditating. Recently Jeff Warren, one of their authors and a meditator, said...
Have you ever tried to resolve a conflict where one of the parties wasn't all that interested in resolution? Maybe it was you.
Perhaps you acted as if you wanted to find resolution and said all the right things:
Maybe you did your best to adopt an inquiring stance, saying things like,
But nothing seemed to work because you weren’t really that interested if it meant you had to change—and so you didn’t commit to the process.
When life was easier, I would sometimes look around and wonder how I would manage the things life might throw my way--if and when--life being what it is. "I teach this stuff," I would say. Will I practice it in times that are not so easy? Recently, I found out...
When I watch aikido students in action, I always learn. At a recent seminar at Portsmouth Aikido, the dojo I founded in 1995, I had another opportunity to reinforce an awareness I've written about before.
I'm not often on the mat these days, and it's always an experience in discovery to sit on the sidelines.
For example, as I watched two beginners struggling to get the technique just right, their focus and commitment was intense, and I began to notice my own body tightening. I sensed the tension in the students' bodies as they practiced the technique, and I could feel it in my own as I observed...
The Power & Presence site is designed to help the reader discover answers, skills, and methods to resolve conflict, build relationships, and become a more powerful and present human being. Judy Ringer is the author.
Aikido is the metaphor we use to help you be more intentional with your ki, communicate purposefully, and create your life and work from center.
Ki (pronounced “key”) is Japanese for universal energy; it’s the central syllable in Aikido, which is often translated as “the way of blending with energy”.
This is an educational website with many free resources.
Enjoy!