Ki Moments can occur anytime. Moments when you realize you have a choice to extend your ki, your energy, in a purposeful way. How we communicate in conflict situations, for example, can influence our relationships and our environment in powerful ways.
It's not enough to read a book about conflict or communication skills; we must engage these ideas with continued practice. As we experience using the new skill, we improve. Over time, ineffective habits are replaced with effective ones.
Practicing new conflict and communication skills requires risk-taking. You experiment, learn, and gradually become more proficient. Start with these five practices for clear communication:
#1) Increase Awareness
Is your current communication style working? If not, try something different. Any step away from the habit will give you information to continue your practice.
#2) Check Your Purpose
Before entering any conversation, determine what you want from it. What do you hope to accomplish? Move from message delivery to a learning stance.
#3) Keep It Safe
Maintain a calm, centered attitude, a respectful demeanor, and positive intent.
#4) Cultivate Curiosity
Develop an open, curious mindset. Regardless of what your conversation partner says, assume a positive intent from them as well.
Try new techniques and learn from them. If you tend toward a passive and accommodating style, try offering a different opinion on occasion. If the opposite is true and you are on the talkative side, stop and listen more.
How Do You Get to Carnegie Hall?
A tourist stopped a New Yorker on the street and asked: "How do you get to Carnegie Hall?" The New Yorker replied: "Practice!"
Change takes place gradually. Review the suggestions above, and try one adjustment today. Let me know what happens. Take time to enjoy your newfound power. And most of all – have fun!