Finding the Hidden Gifts in Daily Conflict
by Judy Ringer
Your struggle with life's challenges can change in an instant.
Unlikely Teachers is a practical tool to help you generate more power, presence, and flow in your relationships and your life.
Much more than a "how-to" book on conflict management, Unlikely Teachers offers personal stories, concrete practices, and real life examples on how to manage something more important—yourself. It will serve you well as a stand-alone resource, and is extremely useful as pre- and post-workshop support.
As a writer, speaker, and martial artist, I teach internationally on how to convert difficult challenges into useful energy. I created Unlikely Teachers so that anyone can have this teaching at any time. Each story applies Aikido principles to real life conflict—arguments, workplace irritations, relationship difficulties—the unexpected and unwanted events that life throws our way.
The book's primary message: You have more power than you think.
- Improve business relationships.
- Reduce stress at home.
- Increase self-awareness and confidence.
- Direct the energy of conflict instead of reacting to it.
Begin now to find the hidden gifts in your daily conflicts.
Table of Contents
Whether on the mat or off, I see the process of conflict similarly. We start by resisting. It just happens. If we're aware enough to change, we connect with the conflict, practice, make discoveries, learn about power, and eventually (if we stay with it), we begin to see the conflict as a teacher.
The six chapters of Unlikely Teachers, like the six stages of conflict, are interrelated and correlate with how we encounter, manage, and resolve the conflict. Each story is complete with its own practice and related examples.
You're welcome to download and print the underlined stories. I ask only that you keep the article intact and use the "about the author" information at the end of each piece. Thank you!
ix Foreword by Thomas Crum
xi Preface: On This Planet
3 Introduction: Hidden Gifts
Part One: Resistance
13 Choosing My Self
19 Listening When It’s Not Easy
26 Unwanted Guests
Part Two: Connection
35 Becoming Each Other
46 Turn Signals and Enlightenment
Part Three: Practice
53 Getting on the Mat
62 Keeping Conflict in Perspective
69 Ah, Yes … Another Sporting Event
Part Four: Discovery
77 Life Is What You Make It
82 Discovery on an Icy Bridge
90 Many Lessons
Part Five: Power
97 Beacon Street
103 Wearing the Hakama: Lessons in Leadership
108 What Is This Thing Called Ki?
117 Inventing Your Life
Part Six: Teachers
129 Where’s the Struggle?
134 Dancing with “Difficult” People
140 Unlikely Teachers
145 Thank You Very Much
151 Afterword: See You on the Mat
163 About the Author