Showing posts with the tag “Centering Practice”

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• November 21, 2017
  21Nov2017

  Thankful: A Ki Moment at Portsmouth Harbor

  

  My early morning walk takes me by the waterfront in Portsmouth, NH, where I live. I see the sun rising over the fast-flowing Piscataqua River and the fishing boats moored nearby. I feel the cool autumn breeze and hear the seagulls calling to each other.

  I have my headphones on, listening to an audiobook. It's a good story, and the audio takes me away from where I am in time and space. I lose my sense of place, and pretty soon I no longer see the harbor, feel the breeze, or hear the gulls.

  But.... this particular morning the sunrise over the harbor pushes its way into my consciousness: Stop! Take those headphones off! Look, listen, feel. Be. Be present to the awesomeness of this moment.

  And I had to take the headphones off. It was an exciting chapter, too!

  I watched myself make the decision to stop, take them off and look around...

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• April 12, 2016
  12Apr2016

  The Art of Listening: Presence and Mindfulness

  

  Listening--really listening--takes practice.

  And presence.

  Mindfulness.

  You can even practice it alone.  

  Set a stopwatch. For 15 seconds, stay quiet and listen.

  What do you hear? Try it again and see if you can hear more this time. What new sounds were there?

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• October 13, 2015
  13Oct2015

  Emotional Triggers: Accept and Let Go

  

  Only when you accept your emotions can you let them go.
  ~ Joy Jacobs, Author, In A Pickle: Nourishing Recipes & Food for Thought

  "Why don't we take this down to the register," he said with what felt like a combination of condescension and sarcasm. I'd stopped in for a pack of gum--first time in this convenience store--found what I wanted and placed it on the counter. The register was about 5 feet from where I stood, and I hadn't seen it.

  The clerk (owner?) took my gum and walked to the register. I followed and handed him a twenty-dollar bill. The gum was $1.39.

  "Do you have anything smaller?" He looked at me over the top of his glasses. He could clearly see when I opened my wallet that it contained a twenty and a five, and he seemed upset that I'd given him the twenty.

  Me: "I do, but I’d like some change."

  Him: "Well, I need change, too."

  Okay, I'm officially triggered now by the customer service demon who lives inside me and wants to say: "Wait a minute--this is a business, right? My mood suddenly soured...

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• September 15, 2015
  15Sep2015

  Warrior, Lunatic or Centered Mom: Which One Are You?

  

  Judy and I have worked together for six years. I’ve told her often how much her work has influenced my life and the way I look at, and handle, conflict.

  A few weeks ago I dropped off our youngest son, age 15, at school four states away. The reason he goes to school so far from us is a longer story than I have space for, but suffice it to say it isn’t because he’s a bad kid. The opposite. He’s a great kid, and it’s really tough for us to drop him off each year. 

  As the two of us pulled up to the aging dorm, sadness overwhelmed me. His campus is old and beautiful--we love it--but his building is not good. New dorms are going up next door, and this building seems anxious to say goodbye to its last boarders so it can be torn down.

  My son was giddy with excitement. When you go to boarding school, you spend all summer away from your friends--friends who are like a second family. He couldn’t wait to get his room set up and find his buddies.

  Arms full of boxes, we arrived at his locked door.

  “Honey,” I said. “I have a bad feeling about this…”

  The door was clearly marked with a handmade sign labeled “Storage.”

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• March 17, 2015
  17Mar2015

  Control Your Temper, Improve Your Life

  

  "Let's hope this is the worst thing that ever happens to me."

  Have you ever said that to yourself in a  moment of frustration? These minor energy drains can add significantly to your daily dose of stress. Or.... these "ki" moments can provide perfect practice opportunities to control your temper and improve your life, because ...

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• December 9, 2014
  9Dec2014

  Paying Attention on My Morning Walk

  

  I noticed the first feeling about 20 minutes into the walk. I’m sure there were many others before this one. It’s just that I happened to perceive this one and pay attention.

  It wasn’t new--a familiar combination of anger, regret, disappointment, and a general wishing I could go back and do things over.

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• October 28, 2014
  28Oct2014

  Happier: Thoughts and Practices on Centering and Mindfulness (Part 4)

  

  It's important to have fun with centering and mindfulness practices, and to know that you may not see a difference today or even tomorrow. Keep practicing, and look back in a year or two. You'll see what's changed.

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• October 14, 2014
  14Oct2014

  Happier: Thoughts and Practices on Centering and Mindfulness (Part 3)

  

  
  I snapped at my husband: "We're going to do it." (Subtext: whether you want to or not.) He snapped back, escalating conversation into confrontation--a common occurrence in uncentered conflict.

  I don't snap that often, so I had to take a look at my reaction. To do that I had to center myself. As Tracie Shroyer put it in her recent post that began this series on Centering and Mindfulness: "Something about intentionally taking a deep breath slows everything down. It brings perspective, quietness and calmness to a crazy situation."

  • How do you get centered, become grounded, mindful and present in life's difficult moments?
  • How do you know when you're centered?
  • What makes you lose it?
  • How can you catch yourself and re-center sooner?

  Today's post is about the connection between centering and emotions. Sometimes our emotional energy is strong enough to hijack our best intentions and damage important relationships. When emotions are high, it's like being in a car that's out of control.

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• September 30, 2014
  30Sep2014

  Happier: Thoughts and Practices on Centering and Mindfulness (Part 2)

  

  One of the questions I'm most often asked is: How do you center yourself, especially in a difficult moment? 

  I found Doug Silsbee's core body practice on centering thoughtful, practical, and easy to understand. As Doug suggests, you center yourself in difficult moments by practicing an excercise like this one over and over again until it becomes your default under pressure. Centering is not automatic. A strong center is similar to any strong muscle. It is developed through practice.

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• September 16, 2014
  16Sep2014

  Happier: Thoughts and Practices on Centering and Mindfulness (Part 1)

  

  Today, Ki Moments begins a series of posts on practices to increase centering and mindfulness.

  Its purpose will be to answer these questions:

  • How do I actually do it?
  • How do I get centered, become grounded, more mindful and present in life's difficult moments.
  • As Dan Harris puts it in his new book, 10% Happier: How I Tamed the Voice in My Head, Reduced Stress Without Losing My Edge, and Found Self-Help That Actually Works--how do I know when I've achieved it?

  In the next weeks, invited guests and I will share thoughts and practices for achieving a more balanced, aware, and centered life, at work and at home. 

  We start with a review and quotations from Dan's' book ...

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