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Welcome to your March issue of Ki Moments. If you're curious about what is meant by Emotional intelligence or if your emotions sometimes get the better of you, you might find this month's lead article of interest ... Should you ever miss an issue of Ki Moments or want to remember something from a past issue, visit our ARCHIVE page. Please share your newsletter. There is a link at the bottom of the page to make it simple. (We never disclose subscriber information.) Good ki,
I turned around in my kitchen and walked into the open dishwasher, cracking my shin on the edge of the door. Ouch!#@%*! Pain went through my body, and my anger barometer zoomed from zero to one hundred in about two seconds. It was all I could do to keep from kicking the door. Good thing - the pent up energy in my body would have torn the door off its hinges. But I caught myself and made some better choices. I quickly put ice and arnica on my shin, drank a glass of water, and took a few deep breaths. The barometer began to drop. I still hurt, but I hadn't done any damage. Practicing aikido on the mat, I learn to first manage myself so that I can better manage the attacker. I center and extend ki (energy, life force) in order to blend with the attacker's power and direct it toward a positive outcome. Off the mat, I can do the same. In the face-off with my dishwasher, a huge emotional attack threatened. How could I blend with that? Emotional Intelligence (EI) - a phrase made famous by Daniel Goleman, author of many books on the subject - begins with self-awareness and self-management. Goleman writes that in high emotional states, we often get "hijacked" by the power of our feelings, but we can learn to catch ourselves and direct our emotions before they direct us. Research shows that EI can be learned and that those with high EI skills receive higher salaries and manage teams that regularly exceed their objectives. When you are intentional with your emotional energy, you increase your EI, improve interpersonal interactions, and lead a happier life. Here are some thoughts that might help:
Emotions happen. And we can make choices about how we manage them. By gaining awareness in the heat of the moment, you will become more practiced at managing all of your emotional energy with intention and purpose. In April, we'll talk about the next EI skill: self-motivation. Stay tuned!
This being human is a guest-house
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
Welcome and entertain them all!
Still, treat each guest honorably.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
Be grateful for whoever comes,
From: Say I Am You, Poems of Rumi P.S. Would you like to listen to this poem? Click here and turn up your speakers.
Emotions can be wonderful teachers. On March 28, my colleague Joy Jacobs and I will be offering our second public workshop based on my book, Unlikely Teachers: Finding the Hidden Gifts in Daily Conflict. This active one-day workshop will help you reframe and manage your most difficult life attacks. You'll gain awareness, choice, and power over your reactions, take an in-depth look at where your life energy is stuck, and begin to release it for more purposeful uses.
Portsmouth Aikido is located at the Seacoast Family Y in Portsmouth. Many of the principles reflected in Ki Moments come from aikido, the Japanese martial art that teaches self-defense through redirection of energy. Beginners through advanced are welcome. It's not too late to join our Women's Beginner Class. The nine-week course began March 4, and meets from noon to 1:00 p.m. each Sunday (no class Easter Sunday). The cost is $95.00 per person for the course and includes a Portsmouth Aikido t-shirt. Women and girls aged 12 or older are welcome. For information, please visit www.PortsmouthAikido.com, or call 603-431-8560.
Judy Ringer Judy Ringer is Founder of Power & Presence Training, a Portsmouth, NH company specializing in unique workshops to help you and your organization manage conflict, communicate effectively, and co-create a more positive work environment. E-mail Judy at judy@judyringer.com for a free initial meeting to discuss your training needs. Ki (from Ai-ki-do) is Japanese for life energy. Ki Moments is a complimentary monthly "e-zine" with tips and how-to articles to help you manage the key moments in your life. If you enjoy our news and stories, feel free to share them with friends or colleagues. Use our "FORWARD" link below to pass it along with our thanks!
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