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Welcome to your April issue of Ki Moments, with tips and inspiration on transforming your "key" moments of conflict into useful and positive energy. In March, we took a look at two important skills of Emotional Intelligence: self-awareness and emotion management (see our ARCHIVE page). Today's topic is self-motivation. As always, I look forward to hearing your thoughts. And please feel free to share your newsletter. There is a link at the bottom of the page to make it simple. (We never disclose subscriber information.) Good ki,
"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we
are." Driving home from the pool Monday morning, I happened to see a young woman walking to school. As the car passed by, we made fleeting but certain eye contact. I was smiling; she was not. In fact, she seemed to be deliberately frowning. "What have you got to be so happy about?" her eyes were asking. "Why are you so unhappy?" I wondered. In that brief encounter I imagined two worlds colliding, or at least two worldviews. It occurred to me once again how -- from moment to moment, through thought, word, and action -- we invent the world we inhabit. How we think determines how we make sense of what happens to us and informs the quality of our days. If we think life is a treasure it most certainly is and we find the bounty in life to support our belief. If we believe life a trial, we will see disappointment, pain, and punishment everywhere and perhaps participate in creating it. When life throws challenges our way, it's especially important to have a worldview that's creative, positive and vision-driven. What we tell ourselves when faced with difficulty makes a difference. Daniel Goleman, author and educator on Emotional Intelligence, calls self-motivation a key skill of emotionally intelligent people. When you're self- motivated, you see challenges in ways that help you learn from them and move forward in life. My mother, Lorna, has a worldview that says we're here to love and help each other and, in turn, we are loved and taken care of. She does and is. My friend, Suzanne believes that perseverance will allow you to move through the seemingly impossible challenges of life with grace and dignity. And she does. My lovely Aunt Mimi, who lived in a wheelchair most of her 83 years, believed "life is what you make it," and the way she lived her full and happy life taught those around her how to do the same. Was my frowning school-bound friend unhappy? Did she really want to make my day miserable, too? Or was it just momentary indigestion? I'll never know. I do know that her emotional state is not about me. We'd never met. I also know that regardless of the fact that we'd never met, depending on my own worldview, I could easily have generated an attitude war in that moment. But I decided not to and continued on with a very enjoyable morning. I can't think of a better way to begin the month of April, bringer of spring and new life, than to remember the power of our innate creativity. Be mindful of what you hope for and what you worry about, what you believe and what you foster in the world. If life truly is what you make it, how are you creating your life today? Read more about Aunt Mimi in "Life Is What You Make It" from Judy's book: Unlikely Teachers
Once a year, my friend and aikido partner, Fiona Blyth, and I offer a one-day program in street-smart self-defense for women. Our next training is April 28 (Saturday), at New Hampshire Community Technical College, Pease Tradeport, in Portsmouth. Registration is required and is limited to twelve participants.
If you've been a participant in any Power & Presence training, you can save on public workshops. Whether you attended another public workshop or a private training for your company or organization, you qualify. If you register online, click the "Alum" ticket. If offline, just let us know. We also offer discounts for groups of two or more people attending together.
Do you like parables and stories? This lovely CD by author, aikidoist, and friend, Thomas Crum, offers a unique look at relationship and useful guidance in moving beyond success. I've listened to it more times than I can remember, and it always has something new to say.
Judy Ringer Judy Ringer is Founder of Power & Presence Training, a Portsmouth, NH company specializing in unique workshops to help you and your organization manage conflict, communicate effectively, and co-create a more positive work environment. E-mail Judy at judy@judyringer.com for a free initial meeting to discuss your training needs. Ki (from Ai-ki-do) is Japanese for life energy. Ki Moments is a complimentary monthly "e-zine" with tips and how-to articles to help you manage the key moments in your life. If you enjoy our news and stories, feel free to share them with friends or colleagues. Use our "FORWARD" link below to pass it along with our thanks!
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