Judy Ringer

Aikido, Conflict, and Me

Power & Presence Training is one of several successful companies I’ve owned over the years, and I understand the courage it takes to lead, manage, and work in high-stress, high-achieving environments.

I’m a high-achiever myself, and I’m committed to concrete skill building, practice, and applications of Aikido principles in “off the mat” business and leadership settings. 

You can expect me to:

• take the time to understand your goals and concerns.
• deliver an excellent product.
• respect you and your people.
• be honest and present.
• create an energizing and safe learning environment.

I will ask you to:

• be curious.
• explore new ideas.
• challenge yourself.
• challenge me.
• have fun!

There is energy in the difficult.

As a teacher, writer, and conflict coach, I lean toward the difficult. While this may sound counter-intuitive, I try to notice the difficult places and learn from them. For example, many of my stories are conflict stories:

• Out for a special evening with my husband, elegant restaurant, all things perfect, except… the piercing cries of the baby at the next table.
• Assisting my mother, I encounter a customer service rep who hails from the planet “Sorry, we can’t do that.”
• Engaging angry students, uncooperative team members, and scary strangers leads me to learn about myself.
• Injury and illness? Unlikely teachers.
• Inner conflict—one the of hardest, I think.
• And the best teacher of all:  family conflict.

What can I learn here?

Where’s the struggle? I know that some of the struggle derives from my actions. I contribute. If I can catch myself in the act, I will begin to alter my relationship to the conflict.

My introduction to conflict as a learning opportunity began in the mid-1980’s with a martial art—Aikido—which I discovered quite by accident and which turned out to be a valuable metaphor and method for managing whatever comes my way.

I began teaching in order to practice and share the process. And that’s how it all started—with ten friends in a donated space in Eliot, ME. Friends called friends who called me. Participants asked me to come to their schools, their companies, and into their homes.

Power & Presence Training was officially launched in 1993.

Almost two decades later, I work internationally with health care, government agencies, high tech companies, arts communities, financial institutions, state and municipal governments, and university systems.

Today, I’m less thrown by conflict. I still have it—will always have it, I imagine. The difference is that I now have a set of tools to engage and transform it. I can hold conflict conversations, manage inner and outer critics, and advocate for myself, in spite of a tendency to accommodate. I have deeper, more connected relationships and much less stress and conflict.

Over the years, I’ve used the Aikido frame to help over 14,000 people reduce conflict, communicate powerfully, and live happier lives.

Other Interesting Facts

Aikido is a physical art that makes my trainings fun and different. For starting me on this path, I am indebted to Thomas Crum, an amazing teacher, mentor, friend, and colleague. I’m also grateful to Wendy Palmer, George Leonard, Sensei Mitsunari Kanai, and Aikido partners around the globe.

I’ve studied and learned from authors Doug Stone, Bruce Patton, Sheila Heen, Margaret Wheatley, Daniel Goleman, William Ury, Arnold and Amy Mindell, Joy Jacobs, and the Harvard/MIT Program on Negotiation, among others too numerous for one Web page.

I’ve written a book, two CDs, and many articles on conflict and communication, and you can find all of them on this Website, many free of charge.

I’m a professional singer and a second-degree black belt in Aikido, and I still teach Aikido at the dojo I founded in 1995, Portsmouth Aikido.

I practice what I teach.

I hope you’ll join me in helping your team, your company, or yourself build these important skills for living life with power and presence.

Dowload Instructor Bio.